"i love you"

something shimmered in the dark distance between the trees and became a light of peace and wholesome thought, pure thought.
lightning struck close and a sound snapped loud like a tree-branch and the light grew to a shining beam of condensed energy, it seemed to have a presence a soul a spirit, it felt like a female. the trail of my focus began to spree upon a truth of love.
the light grew towards the meadow where i lay. the blades turned white as if they were ashes and dust flew about like a twister was landing. swiftly it swung to the tip of my jaw, then darkness..... and i awoke in a split millisecond.
life seemed clear! the blades were flourishing green again dancing and shining their tiny rippled faces to the sun beating hard on my wet clothes, all the wind that had survived was dwindling in the summer air and the broken tree branch stood straight in the ground rootless as if on its own now with small winged inhabitants singing in its arms.
i had no concept of time or recollection of my body, i felt as if id left it for days and my soul was trying to find its control room behind the corneas again. my spine quivered and hair shot strait away from my neck and my skull shook them back to the skin. some remnant of the female spirit had touched me and hadn't left yet, almost calling me but voiceless, the pure thought still lingered. all my bones where crushed ice, my muscles ached and my skin was warm and stuck to itself from sleeping in my clothes.
how long had i been in this meadow? the blades of grass cupped a perfect imprint of my body in a fetal position and a part of me felt guilt for them as they lay there suffocated to death, ground into the worms and soil.
the moon armored itself with the sky so far away from me it commanded the percentage of h2o left in my body to run towards the ocean and i ran like a track-star fighting for his undeserved scholarship for lack of educational motives towards the sun. as i grew closer to the sand the birds all flew with me like i was showing them a new haven or perch for them to gather straw for their newborn, they almost seemed to be carrying me. the ocean sounds became a faint tone to my ears, the wind overpowered it but i still heard the waves crash.
all my senses heightened as i got closer and closer to the water, the front of my shirt and pants were dry but my sox and backside of me where still drenched with sweat and water i had borrowed from those poor blades of grass i left behind. would they regain their strength and grow to be long and lush for prey to hide from merciless crouching predators? my mind jostled the thought.
she felt stronger as i got closer the the edge of the earth. as i dove into the drink of dark salty and frigid, fast and fierce like a wild horse escaping fiery woods. my wholesome pure thought still thrived as prominent as a tale my mother told me every night to put me to sleep as a child. the birds where still above the water i swam in, not to concerned with me but at the same pace as if we had the same direct objective. what was it?
i became a fish under there i could hold my breath forever, i could see more clearly than my eyes ever had, and i could spurt though the currents like an experienced penguin on the hunt for food after cautiously caring for its unborn' capsule of life for months. i dove deeper and deeper with a great sense of purity and divine love for life as if i had never had one ever. had i? was i given a new soul? was this being born? for the first time? i pondered the thought for one moment, too short to ask any more small meaningless questions of which could never be answered.
as i swam deeper it got warmer and i felt more at peace and at home. the pure thought was all there was at this point and the shimmer of the birds bellies had fallen to tons of small specks in the rippling glass of the surface and resembled stars in a sea of black night. the specks dispersed in all separate directions at the exact same moment as i simultaneously felt alone again and panic rose through my chest and i started to swallow water, salty and cold inside my body but all my exterior was burning in a furnace of pure thought, the captivity of my panic had released me and i regained strength of my clench to break free of any negative notion.
i had finally seen my purpose and meaning, she had me, the feminine spirit i had felt was there shining bright white in a glow unexplainable. even if there were words to explain it would blind an ordinary person to utter them but i would have this vision to keep forever, these eyes where privileged at this moment of pure wholesome thought. her eyes gleamed like pearls in the clean shadowless ocean floor, her hair stood still in a weaving standstill, motionless, her body was poised in a comfortable statuesque form, she radiated every beautiful thing in the universe as if she had given birth to all things flawless and hypnotic. we stood there enjoying each-others presence and vibration. she was my muse and i her staple. her unicorn, her beloved.
i could not see the surface nor the floor, we were suspended in a perfect circle with our fingertips touching with energy not by flesh, legs straight toes pointed down, limp. a spindle of controlled adornment. i felt magnetized and in au of her beauty. as the energy intensified i noticed myself taking on her brilliant bright glowing characteristics, beaming light outwards to see nothing but tiny gold fish in schools of trillions surrounding us keeping the florescent glow of our pure thought in an orb reflecting off of every one of their miniscule scales of shimmery gold. it intensified our light to a magnificent magnitude. she looked away from me tilting her almost glass figured head slowly as she closed her pearlescent eyes towards the surface. she seemed so fragile yet unbreakable! the perfect creature! my head rose to look up with eyes open and the water stood still in a shiftless current, my eyelids shut and all i could feel was the fish effortlessly intertwining around us in a perfect sphere keeping all that could harm us outside in the true grips of mother nature with sharks, giant squid and poisonous jelly fish.
as i regained my focus i could see what looked like the starlit specks of birds bellies and my equilibrium flexed and reacted as if the earth was falling away from us,. our white lit essence which surrounded us like silk fluttered in the motion of leaving the depths of the abyss and truly still perpetuated into the purest thought of love of a child, the new human soul. the egg. pure soul, untainted.
the gold sphere of fish had departed us at the entrance to the sky, the earth disappeared from sight in seconds and the birds feet awaited our surrounding silky shroud blanketing our light. carrying us and singing, as i took a deep breath of clean replenishing air my clothes where dry and new, immaculate! was i dying? had i lived? was that it? my mind channeled her voice, it was sweet soft and in a beautiful high pitch she said "we are equal and ready to give life, the beginning of the end is when you dont trust in us, or yourself, the moment you knew you could live underwater and that the universe was yours.......you had me and now we are one." " i love you"